Italian Restaurant
So last night we went to dinner with a few clients and two of us from my company. Everyone who went to dinner knows each other really well and we are pretty much friends as well as colleagues. It was a really nice Italian place that was outside along a lake, an overall nice setting. The head of the table, the more senior member of my company, was given the wine list. All of a sudden, this guy started speaking in an Italian accent, and even starting using common Italian words. It went something like this…
Waiter (in real Italian accent): Would you like to choose a wine?
Colleague (in fake Italian accent): Si, I would, grazie.
Waiter (in real Italian accent): Here you are sir.
Colleague (in fake Italian accent, but worse): Grazie, buon uomo.
Later
Waiter (in real Italian accent): Have you made a choice?
Colleague (in fake Italian accent, but louder this time): Si grazie, I would like this one (points to a wine).
Me: Scott (name altered to protect the guilty), you’re Irish!!
Colleague (reverting back to his NY accent): Eff you, they like it.
Me: They are making fun of you at the captain station.
Later
Waiter (still in his real Italian accent): Would you like to order some appetizers
Colleague (fake accent getting worse, sounds like bad acting from a elementary school rendition of The Godfather): Si, we woulda lika some mooozzzerrelllaaaaa, and calamatttiiiiii per favore il friendo
Me: Scott, cut it out!
Colleague (NY accent getting heavier): Eff off, I am speaking their language.
Me: If we went out for sushi, would you take off your shoes put on a robe and speak with a Japanese accent? Maybe bow your head.
Another Colleague: Can we go for Mexican tomorrow so I can hear Speedy Gonzalez?
Another Colleague: We HAVE to go for Indian.
Another Colleague: If we get Chinese you must PROMISE to speak with an accent.
Later
Waiter (real accent still going on, brings the receipt): Thank you sir and have a good night.
Colleague (won’t give it up): Gratzie, ciao. Ita wasa buono.
Me: Let’s go Mario Brother.