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Today is the first full day I have our two older kids alone. Well not entirely alone but I'll get to that in a second. Yesterday Patti flew to Minnesota for cousin Kara's baby shower and she took Emerson, our 3 month old. Despite my pleading and bribing, she left the other two with me. I dropped her off at the airport at noon on Friday and she is getting back Sunday night. I have to fly to Montreal Sunday on a 7:30 flight so there is a 3 hour gap between the time I have to leave for the airport and the time Patti gets home. Enter my parents. They are flying up today to help me out and to watch the kiddies on Sunday night until Patti gets home. They then take off back home on Monday morning. It might sound crazy that they can fly up from Atlanta for 2 days but my father is a retired Delta employee and they fly for free, on standby.

So yesterday I had the two old ones. Let me describe how that went.

Emily is almost 4 and is very independent. For the most part she is a good listener and is fairly care-free. Ethan, on the other hand, is trouble. And big trouble. Our house, both second and first floor, has more toys than a medium sized day care. There is crap all over the place. We no longer have a dining room so that the kids have their own 4 walls to keep nothing but stuff to play with. So what does Ethan want to do? Climb on tables, pull down lamps, hide the remote control, take the telephone, push papers off the counter and take whatever Emily has. It's crazy. It's like being a baby lifeguard with no break. I constantly have to hover around him to make sure he does not hurt himself or destroy something. It's hard to describe. He is not rational. I gave him a piece of pizza for dinner last night and he refused to eat it because he kept saying it was hot. IT WAS NOT HOT!! It was freakin freezing by the time I just threw it out and gave him something else. I thought to myself "This is crazy, I am eating it, Emily is eating it, I put the little piece on a fork next to his hand so he KNEW it was not hot and he kept saying HOT HOT and turning his head away." It was...maddening. A weaker mind, if that is possible, than mine would have gone insane.

Anyway, the day was long and tiring. I am not used to it. Patti does it all day long, every day, with a third child but I am used to being the hunter. But Ethan was asleep by 7 and Emily by 8. I had a uneventful evening, read, watched some TV, cleaned up and got ready for another day of joy.

Today is starting out promising. Ethan, who is usually up before or right at 6, woke up closer to 7. He was then either tired, upset, or both and just wanted to lay with me while I watched the Today show with Lester Holt and Natalie Morales. There is something about Lester that I don't like. I think he tries too hard on the show to create chemistry. He makes awkward jokes. He tries to flirt. His timing is off and the girls look at him like they looked at me in junior high when I had bad skin and uncombed hair.

So this morning Ethan and I had a very slow, relaxing morning. Emily, who has been sick lately, slept past 8 so I was able to get Ethan dressed and downstairs. It''s suppose to be cold and damp all day with rain so it's more indoor chaos. Not fun but at least my parents will be here to help play lifeguard.

I have no idea how Patti does this all the time and is not muttering under her breath, slightly shaking with a twitch at the end of each day. Having kids is like eating lobster, it's great but a lot of work.