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September 26, 2007

Where do these idiots come from?

Some idiot out there goes and beheads a duck. Not a wild duck but a tame duck. Not out in the country smack dab in the middle of the city. What has this world come too?

An event like that might just get those who are against the death penalty to change their minds. Do we really want these kind of people to procreate. I donít think so.

So if we canít give the idiot the death penalty what would be an appropriate punishment? Let me throw out a few of my thoughts; put him in the middle of a PETA convention and lock the doors, make him do the duck walk while making quacking sounds as the super bowl halftime show, handcuff him tape is mouth open and lay him in a cage with oh letís say a couple hundred ducks and geese. Okay thatís a few of my thoughts.

By the way if you didnít hear "he is a government employee". I think I just answered my question.

September 18, 2007

A chase

There was a cat and mouse chase at my office today. I was the cat and the mouse was a mouse. I have to give the mouse a lot of credit he was good at it. I was actually a bit somber after it ended so tragically for the little fella.

It all started in my office right near my trash can. I thought I saw something dart in behind it. Was it my imagination or a hallucination? No it wasnít either it was a beady eyed mouse looking up at me. As we stared at each me thinking okay now what? The mouse most likely thinking something like holy crap Iím in trouble thatís one big monster up there. The chase was about to begin.

A couple of rounds around the trash can a quick dash under the credenza, back to behind the trash can. A few futile attempts at stomping on him in there somewhere. Okay this wasnít going to be easy. I better warn the women in the office.

As I am about to leave my office our receptionist comes into view and the mouse too. He was escaping and then a scream. No need for the warning now the siren went off. Okay the women in the office are now aware a mouse is on the loose.

I ask for assistance in surrounding the little guy. I am met with ďare you nuts, get himĒ. Off he goes behind our plan copier then under the cubicle wall and under my assistantís desk. Yes another scream. Thanks for letting me know where he is. Could you maybe stand over there and chase him back to me if he comes out. Another ďare you Nuts! There he goes under the next cubicle over to the wall behind the postage machine. This was getting to be a bigger ordeal than I wanted.

Okay where did he go? A scream and another scream. I guess he is on the move again. Off down the hall he went and entered another office. Bad move fella I can cut you off now. Itís going to be me and you alone in the office. I shut the door and barricade the bottom. There was no escaping me now. I chased him out into the open and he headed for the door. Door was blocked and he had to stop ďWhackĒ the mop handle ended it. I wrapped him up in a bundle of Kleenex and took him out to the trash bin. It was very anti climatic to say the least.

The women in the office were safe. Life as we know it went back to normal. Well maybe not quite normal there are a few people who are afraid the little fellaís brothers and sisters may come looking for him. Looks like an opportunity for a little fun.

September 17, 2007

Joy

I am quite surprised that grandparent is not one of the definitions for joy. Spending time with my 3 grandchildren is more enjoyable than I imagined. I cherish every joyful moment with them.

The oldest Sean is grown so fast and is becoming quite the boy. He has gone fishing with me on a couple of occasions now. He might not be the most patient but that will come in due time. He accompanied his dad and I on a duck scouting trip. He chatted with us about ducks, birds and other outdoor stuff while we moved about in the boat looking for places to set up a duck blind. Now he talks about going hunting with Papa Tim. How sweet is that? He has a ways to go before we get into a lot of the outdoor stuff but the seed has germinated.

My granddaughter is quite the precious little thing. She has the cutest smile and cute eyes to go along with it. Mira is definitely a babe magnet when I have her at a ballgame or some other public place. She likes to be free and on her own quite a bit. You might get to hold her but it wonít be for long. Next year will be when we start working on the joys of fishing. I think the chances for me to get her into hunting are slim but I am up for the challenge. If she is anything like her mother I know for sure that Iíll have another precious fishing buddy.

And then there is the youngest, Kyle. This guy just might be the most adventurous one of the three. You cannot take your eye off of him. He can disappear in seconds. He has a crawl that would make any drill sergeant proud. He crawls like a good solider and is not only fast but very stealth too. I donít think his dad and I will have any problems in having him join us outdoors. The problem might be when we get him out there might just be trying to keep up with him. I look forward to seeing this guy grow up.

Yes indeed my pride and joy in a nice bundle of three at the moment. Will there be more? I sure wouldnít mind.

Could it happen

I wonder what the over/under is on the years for OJ.

September 13, 2007

No Butts About.

If youíre a smoker and are reading this GOOD. This little rant might even make Al Gore happy which is the least of things that I want to do. People who smoke need to either dispose of their butts in an ashtray or up their butts.

Seeing mindless idiots that toss their butts willy-nilly out their car windows or on the sidewalk prior to entering a building should be hit upside the head with a 2 x4. I am curious as to what they are thinking. Obviously theyíre not. Maybe we should get rid of restrooms and deposit our waste anywhere we feel like. Someone please tell me why these imbeciles think they can just drop their butts anywhere they feel like it.

I have not been a big fan of smoking bans being imposed on private businesses. A business should have the right to cater to whatever clientele they choose. Everyone has the right to choose where they want to spend their dollars. Letís not ban smoking but hey smokers keep your butts to yourself.

If smoking is that bad for us that big brother has to impose all these restrictions on us than why allow it all. Make it illegal for godís sake. Wait a minute smokers generate revenue so we canít get rid of it can we. Think about it for a minute though. A big outcry is that smokers have significantly more health problems. So the loss in tax revenue would be offset by savings to our government controlled healthcare system. Wait a second; I am jumping the gone a bit on the last statement. Thatís a rant yet to come. Sorry I digressed.

If you smoking idiots, fools, etc. want to continue to slowly kill yourselves please do it a bit more discretely.

September 10, 2007

No rest for the wicked

This last weekend could be titled no rest from dusk to dawn. Both days were pretty much busy from the time I awoke to just about time to go to bed. There was no fishing or hunting involved either

It began Saturday morning with a little 4.1 mile run. I am hoping to run a half marathon on October 20th so I need to get some running time in there. That went relatively well just a minor issue with my calve. Something Iíll need to work on. A morning run gets things going if you know what I mean.

After a quick shower it was onto a project that was long overdue. Way back last spring a section of about 10' x 10' of our shingles were damaged during a storm. My son, Andy, had patched it with a tarp. The patch worked really well and allowed me to delay this project. I felt I was already living on borrowed time so Andy and I fixed it up Saturday morning. The roof looks like nothing ever happened once again. Take that off the honey do list.

Then it was onto the next project. The dear wife wanted a little patio for under the picnic table. I guess dirt isnít clean enough. We decided upon an 8í x 8í square area using 16Ē x 16Ē patio blocks. Anyone looking for a new ab workout? Put in 36 16 x16 patio blocks. That project took up the afternoon and evening. I was allowed a dinner break. Another project taken off the honey do list.

Sunday morning I was off to help Andy put in two windows on his house. We had previously installed a few others and these were the last two of his project. That went very well. Itís amazing how you learn from past experience and things go so much quicker. That last window took us about half the time it took for the first window we replaced. It was my pleasure to help him since he has helped me with plenty of projects before he was a homeowner.

From there it was back to my house to patch the area around the patio installed on Saturday. I added a little dirt around the edge and then placed sod from the clump of grass that I cut out on Saturday. Looks great now.

Mow the yard real quick. A quick 45 minute bike ride. Off to dinner at Andy & Deniseís. Then onto our mixed couples bowling league (thatís a story to come).

All in all a great weekend.

September 06, 2007

Bring it on

To many Minnesotans Labor Day marks the end of summer. So many folks here hang it up at this point. The docks are pulled from the lake place; the boats get put away and the thoughts of hibernating start to come forward.

No thoughts of hibernating in my mind. In fact itís just the opposite. This is when I start to get excited about what comes next. Thereís hunting seasons on the horizon. Fall fishing is great. After that itís ice fishing. The fun is just about to begin.

I wish you all a merry fall and a happy winter.